Words of wisdom from good friends.

Sometimes things suck about being here, other times it's good. My friends say some really smart things though, whenever I do get the chance to talk to them. 

"I truly believe that nothing is permanent unless you choose for it to be."

"Just do whatever you want and remember that there is another life waiting for you whenever Korea stops doing it for you."

English market day hell.

It kind of looks like I am in a cartoon, doesn't it? I am trying to sale this guy a potato.

This is my market where I sat for five hours completely unprepared.

This is Kelly's clothing store. 

My kid's monologue consisted of them buying two potatoes and a tomato. I would have gladly bought the real vegetables if I knew what was going on. Instead, I was supplied with half a plastic tomato and two plastic sweet potatoes that have seen better days.

Actually, all the plastic fruit on hand was quite expired. 

Oh, market day. Market day that I knew nothing about. As I believe I mentioned previously, I teach about seven regular classes a day and two after school classes. This market day was for my regular classes (my seventy, six years old and about twenty, five year old students). The market day is based on vegetable/fruit work books we do in class. However, I was never informed till the day before that I was suppose to be teaching them a monologue between a produce seller (me) and a customer (them). We went over the script several weeks ago, when we reached that page in the book. I had no idea that for the past month we were suppose to be role playing and learning the script from memory. The Korean teacher I work with wasn't informed either. However, Kelly who teaches the seven years old had been working on it with her students. Also, I don't even teach my five years old students with any notebooks. I see them twice a week and just work on speech with them. 

That is Yedea for you. Complete and total lack of organization. I didn't get in trouble or anything. I mean I couldn't. How was I suppose to know. Kelly didn't know any better to tell me. She didn't know we were preforming this on video tape with the children. However, I was very pleased with my kids being able to pull this out of the air with me. We practiced a few times before the camera was rolling. Other classes were able to pull it off a little bit more smoothly then others and of course the seven year old kids blew us out of the water. It was just completely frustrating because I don't want to appear as though I am not doing my job and I don't like my kids looking dumb. The Korean teachers that were also left out of the loop and were irritated as well.

I had one Korean teacher upset because she did not realize Kelly and I were sitting in a certain room waiting for the kids to come in and out. She asked us why we didn't tell her where we were. I was like I didn't even know what we were doing till 10:00 am this morning. We just assumed all the Korean teachers knew the deal. 

This wouldn't be such a big deal, but this stuff is pretty common at school. Next week is cooking week and I am still waiting on the details for that. I am sure I'll have some type of story to report.

Yedea or Yedai?

My school uses both spellings for various documents and signs. It bothers me and I really want to say something, but graphically Korea just isn't evolved that way. In graphic design courses in school, we just learned about constancy, but I am sure anyone who majored in advertising, some form a business or just people with commonsense would tell you the same, "The spelling of your business should always be the same." Although my school lacks in constancy in its brand identity, on a constant basis my school never fails to provide stories day in and day out.

February 18, 2009

I have a twenty minute four year old class and its hell. The understand no English or at least they pretend they don't. They laugh every time I speak and the only English I can get them to repeat is the 10 Little Indian song. I  have this one little girl though who is the devil. She just won't do anything and is completely disruptive. This particular day she comes up to me and tugs at my shirt. I know she needed to use the restroom, but I wanted her to try to say the word bathroom. As I asked her she opened her mouth to reveal this green, mucusy lugy. It was gross and another little girl followed her lead and did the same thing.

March 2, 2009

It is the start of their new school year. There are no regular classes, just the new students and parents were invited to the school as a type of meet and greet. They had a singing magician that provided entertainment. He was very impressive by puling pigeons out of no where and creating balloon animals. He even preformed a puppet show. After the entertainment our principle, Mrs. Shin, introduced all of us teachers. When she got to me, she called me Kelly, the other American teacher who was not even there. I didn't bother her to correct her. Apparently, Koreans think Kelly and I look the same, even though she is blond and I am brunette. And as she introduced me to the audience I was expected to ramble off an introduction. Although I couldn't stop coughing or blowing my nose, the audience seemed to like my little speech. I just have already realized just to compliment them on their amazing country and that I am so excited to be here. 

Later that night, my boss took my whole work out to dinner to an authentic Japanese restaurant. Plates of sushi, vegetables, soups and duck were constantly being put down in huge platters in front of us. One of the platters was completely still moving; sea squirt, octopus and something else unidentifiable all chopped up, but alive. I did eat some still squirming octopus, but that's as far as I ventured. The other Korean girls didn't touch the other things, so I stayed away from it. Just the older man I worked with was eating it. i don't really know his whole job description, but I see him at the front desk, driving the bus and other random things.

March 17, 2009

During a typical class. The first ten to fifteen minutes is dedicated to talking and answering questions. After that we usually work in a workbook. At which time we go over each section and I walk around the class making sure everything is done correctly. Constantly, though I walk into walls of horrible, Korean gas. Which if you have any vegetarian friends I equate it with a smell like that. There Korean diet constants of a lot of leafy vegetables and these kids just let it go. I adopted this method with my own personal gas during, class. I don't do anything I would normally do; hold it, leave the room, etc. This is going to be the one thing I miss when I leave the country the ability to pass gas freely. 

March 20, 2009

Boogies. It is not uncommon to look around any of my classes at any given time and half the class having one or even two of their fingers half way up their nose. On this particular day this boy got a huge, moist green boogie and he wanted to show me. I gagged.

March 22, 2009

I was teaching my five year old after school class. You have to understand these children, who are either four or five, have been here since 10:00 am at the latest. There are no nap times and there are no half days like Americans experience with pre-school and kindergarten. These Kids are irritable, barely comprehend English and rather come up and poke me to see if I am real then repeat the words,"Good morning Mommy! Good Morning Daddy! Dog. Cat. Sister. Brother. Doll. Robot. etc." So in between getting them to speak we sing songs and watch animated stories about the topic we are going over. It is a rather small class, only four students and it is fifty minutes long. There attention span at 3:00 pm is about four minutes. Usually, two of the boys run around throwing there books  that go with the lesson that they can't even read. I don't mind, as long as when they are moving I here them repeat the words. This day however, thy were paying attention to a certain degree more so then usual. They had there tiny little chairs in front of me and were actually sitting. They were fidgety and hitting each other, but at least they were sitting. I looked down though and notice this one boy's penis was out and he was laughing. I was a little shocked, I haven't quite prepared for this moment and now they started video taping are classes. The feed streams live on a rotating basis through the classrooms on a screen in the lobby. That was the last thing I needed to get in trouble for some little boy flashing me. I immediately threw my forearms in an "x" and said, "Ani!" (which translates to no and crossing our arms enforces that). He pulled his pants up and laughed. Unfortunately, this was not my last little Asian penis encounter. 

Before the class had started, I was having a conversation with one of the Korean teachers, who teach the five years old. I was telling her how this class is my most difficult and was asking her if she liked teaching kids this young. She said in her accent, "They make me purer." She explained it as, they are uncorrupted and innocent. It makes her feel that way about life, while she teaches them. She is reminded of the innocence in the world. I guess it helps her not become so cynical. However, when the little boy flashed me, he knew it was wrong and funny. It's like they are knowingly abusing their innocence for their comedic advantage. 

Oh and in addition to seeing a kid's penis, I also got bit shortly after that. One of the boys was trying to make a run for the door and I put my arm out to stop him and then he bit it. He did not break the skin, but again I was shocked. A very fun filled fifty minutes.

The teacher and I were also discussing the difference between American schools and Korean schools. And all the hours Koreans spend going to school and studying. They literally have no life and no one in high school works. She said there is no other choice, but to study. In America I explained there are always choices. You can be lazy and get pushed right through the system and the amount of money your parents spend on your education can lead to even more choices. In Korea everyone goes to the same schools. No charter, religious or private choices are available. She said you are starting to see some choices, but not a lot. 

April 2, 2009

I have a ten minute break between my classes in the morning. I usually sit a bench outside the classrooms and near the bathrooms with a coffee. On this particular day a little boy runs to the bathroom door with his pants around his ankles and his shirt lifted up to his neck, his little wang hanging out screaming and crying. I couldn't understand anything he was saying an didn't know how to help. I went and got a Korean teacher. He was constipated and needed help wiping his ass. Yea, I definitely was not about to help with that one.

My week with no computer.

Traditional neighborhood market. Smiling dead pig.

Lots of seafood in the sun.

Dried fish.

Turtles and eels.

You could smell these strawberries over all the raw fish.

Octopus.

The Royal Tombs. In one of the three tombs in the park was the ninth king and his wife at another. The last tomb was for the eleventh king, his son. The tenth king you may be wandering was horrible. He was the other son. I have no idea where his tomb was, but I don't think his ended well.

The first signs of springs.

The tomb is inside the mound and all the statues are placed around it. Your not allowed on to the area. There is a fence keeping you back. I learned though that in the country side where there cementaries, normal Koreans also were buried with this dumb like mound above there grave.

This girl actually works with my aunt. She was visiting a friend of her's in the army in Seoul. I met up with them for a few beers in Itaewon. This bar was packed with Americans. There was no Koreans there, besides for the three people that worked there. The upstairs bar had a Led Zepplin cover band with bad wigs and all to look like Jimmy Page and Robert Plant. They weren't bad. But there was a ton of nasty older military couples rocking out.

And now for my computer:

My logic board broke. I don't know anything about it, but it just sounds expensive. Luckily, my warranty came through and covered it. However, I wish that the whole process was simple. I went to the underground Coex Mall's "a" store and they referred me to a the authorized Apple repair store. They handed me a map and broken English verbal directions. So after getting lost finding the escallator, I finally after a few minutes made my way to the ground level outside. Looking up there was a dizzing amount of skyscrapers. Beautifuly lit and designed buildings. I was looking for a building that said Ubase, which the korean sales associate said and the map had highlighted. Walking towards the six lane street I stopped to read the tops of all the builings; Hyundai Mall, City Air Termainal, City Tower, Citibank, Oakwood Hotel, etc. I saw a Fedex Kinkos as listed on the map and assumed I was heading in the right direction. 

The sales associate said it should no take more the five minutes to get to my destination. After five minutes, I stopped a woman for help armed with my map. She pointed, spoke 3 words of English, I and headed the way she pointed. Then I filed in the blanks of here directions with my own interpretation and wound up even more lost. I walked into a nice restaurant and asked the host for help. She came outside and walked me to a corner, then another older man crossed the street and they both read over the map. They told m straight and to the left. Again, I was still lost. I then went to two paring lot attendants and another older man ran over, who then lead me to the building. We crossed back over the street and back towards the mall. Passed another and correct Fedex Kinkos and turned down a street, where the building was suppose to be. As he ran into the restaurant on the corner, I spotted the tiny Ubase sign off the side of the building. On top of the building in huge letters was the word KIM, but no where on the map did it say that. Just as I discovered it, the man ran out to tell me. I thank him for his kindness, no one in the US would do that. I went in to the building just a couple 100 feet away. Ran up to the third floor and got to the door, but it closed.

The next day I went back and found it a lot quicker. When i dropped it off they asked if they could delete everything and I said no! I was fearing the worse up until I got it home and turned it on and everything was still there. Then I plugged in the ethernet cord and it worked! 

Now my next issue: The light bulb burned out in my bathroom. I can't figure out how to get the limp off. I have perfected showering in the dark, which is no easy task. The shower head is not fixed to the wall. It's hand held. However, I have not had the balls to try shaving in the dark, yet. As of right now there is no need, too. 

Macbook pro.

My three month old computer broke. Literally, one second it was fine and then the next not so much. The ethernet port broke spontaneously. Luckily, it is covered by my warranty or else it would have been about $700 problem to fix. Unfortunately, I am going on two weeks without a computer. The repair place is waiting for a part. As soon as I get it back I have a lot of pictures to post.

Helpless.

Mr. Shin.

Kelly and me in my apartment.

The most annoying thing about being in Korea is that you are completely helpless, when it comes to everyday problems. Things like going to the pharmacy to get medicine requires the aid of one of the English speaking teachers. Thankfully, the Korean culture is overly helpful. Especially, one teacher at the school, who's English is great, has taken me to the bank three times and has came with me to the doctors. She is also willing to translate for me, when I have an issue and need to speak to the director of the school. Recently my Internet has stopped working. Which is my life line. I can't just call Comcast and have them walk me through it. I have to call my boss and he has to come over, which is always a little awkward.

So I call Mr.Shin and less then an hour later he is at my apartment. He quickly unplugs and replugs some cords and before I know it my Internet is restored. Now the awkwardness starts. He starts inspecting my tiny apartment. Wrapping up cords and sticking them behind furniture, fixing my screen on the window and looking at my pictures on my refridgerator. He tells me my father is very handsome. Then he goes in to my kitchen and starts opening my cabinets. Kelly and me cringe cause I have s drawer full of tampons and pads in the kitchen and we can only imagine Mr. Shin's reaction if he opens it (no one uses tampons here, they aren't virginal). He skips over the drawer, but I am a little uncomfortable because in America we don't randomly go through people's houses. Kelly assured me he did the same to her and they are just curious about how we live.

He then sits down by my computer and picks up my Nikon and asks to take a picture us of us. He tells me about his thirty year old Nikon and proceeds to play with my camera. Mr. Shin studied art and always asks to see my own personal work. He told me he wanted to interview me for the job because he saw I went to art school. It's kinda of weird art school got me the job even though I had no prior teaching experience.

Unfortunately, after he left because he had an appointment to drink with his friend (everything is translated to appointment not meeting, hanging out with or anything casual) my Internet stopped working. So this means another weird interaction at my apartment in the near future.

Actual pictures of me.

These are pictures from a few weeks ago, when I was in Hongdae. I posted pictures from this night already. Here are pictures I got from my friend Jenny to prove I am actually in Korea. In this picture you can see my white bra. It is because of her flash, you couldn't see it when I was walking around.

Greg, Justin and me (a little Philly in Korea).

Random Korean girl, Justin, Aaron, Greg, and me.

Beer in my eye.

Aaron and me.